"Say what?!"

I think I have a super power. Super Hearing! But it only applies in eavesdropping situations. Allow me to explain.
In normal conversations my hearing is average to sub-par. I usually have to ask, "What?" or "Huh?" a few times during any given conversation because at some point my ears just can't decipher what message left a person's mouth. So much so that friends often make fun of me for being deaf. I don't know what it is about close range conversation that makes my ears malfunction. If I miss out on part of your monologue, it's either one of two things. Maybe sometimes both.
One: I have an attention span of a two year old and if the crap subject you decide to converse to me about isn't uber-riveting, the sanity preservation department in my brain puts my ears into automatic shutdown mode and then I have to work to override the order to catch up to what you're talkin' 'bout, therefore I have to ask you again, "Wait...what?"
Two: My hearing is genuinely awful and I really didn't understand what you just said.
There is one situation when my hearing is absolutely brilliant. The aforementioned eavesdropping situation. It doesn't matter if you're behind a shut door, five tables over in a crowded restaurant, across the room, or across the house...if my ears pick up the slightest hint of an argument, or a juicy-fied scandal, consider them tuned in. Don't think I go around purposely eavesdropping. No. It's not my fault the super ears pick up on gossip keywords like "cheating manwhore" or "skankified slut" wherever they go. They just do. And once they start listening, they don't stop until every last detail is divulged, only then do they move on. And unless you happen to be speaking in a nano-whipsper, your story is mine. Beware the super ears.
Okay. So maybe it's not a super power, so much as selective listening. Maybe?